Well I haven't blogged about this, but I do think I have gone through something that may help someone else in the future. I didn't really understand it at the time, but looking back I have clearer eyes.
So back in May, we were excited to learn that we were expecting Baby #3! Life was GRAND, but somewhere deep in my heart I think I knew something was wrong. My test didn't appear positive fast like the other two did and with each passing day I was expecting to begin feeling sick and just never did. Then it happened (early June)- worst nightmare ever- MISCARRIAGE! We wanted that baby and I couldn't understand why it was being taken from me?? I wouldn't wish that on anyone. To me losing that baby at 6 weeks- was well, losing a baby! No other way to put it.
I do feel that that baby is up in heaven right now- hopefully being rocked by great grandparents and loved ones. And I believe in my heart that I will meet this baby again one day! But from here on out I don't want to hide my "story" anymore.....if the pain I went through can help just one other mom, then I want to share it! I want to share in her pain!
In the mean time- EVERYONE I knew was pregnant, getting pregnant, or having a baby! I had the "woe is me" moments a lot! I still don't understand why I lost that baby, but time has healed the pain.
Now we were faced with - Do we have another?? Will it happen again?? Can I deal with another miscarriage?? Lots of questions! Just when I thought I was satisfied with my 2 little monkey boys, I get this.....
Yep pregnant again! This time it was like the boys- bright right away! We told our parents but swore them to secrecy - just in case something went wrong. And then a couple weeks passed and I started the good ole "all day sickness". This was another good sign for me. 4 weeks pass and I finally go to the doctor (which happened to be yesterday) and we get this......
My doctor says everything looks good! Baby has a 172 heartbeat and all looks healthy! Praise the Lord! I am about 8 1/2 weeks along and Baby is due around May 13th!
So there it is - I'm going to be a mom of 3! And 1 Angel Baby! :)
309/365
2 years ago
8 comments:
Elizabeth, this just brought tears to my eyes and a lot emotions. Thank you so much for sharing. I, too, had a miscarriage almost exactly a year before Luke was born & I wasn't far along. However, it is like you said, it is still a baby. I loved how you referred to that baby as an "Angel Baby". Congrats on the new little one. Can't wait to hear more about him or her!!
Congratulations Elizabeth and I am so sorry to hear about your previous miscarriage. Having and trying to have children can be so incredibly heartbreaking at times. It was 2 years of waiting and wondering if we could even have children before I had Isaac (hence his name) and it seemed like everyone around me was pregnant. There were many many tears then. And now with our newest little one it took a year of trying which was painful and trying. While I don't know at all what it is like to lose a precious baby I understand the pain that comes along with trying to build a family. We'll be praying for this pregnancy and are so excited for you all!
:) So glad you shared your story! You and your sweet family (especially including angel baby) are on our minds and prayers :) I'm so excited for you guys!
Thank you so much for sharing this Elizabeth! We tried for 18 months and had two miscarriages before I got pregnant with Hannah. It was absolutely heartbreaking and it is horrible that people feel so alone at these times, when so many people go through the same thing. Not a day goes by that I do not think of my angel babies. Congratulations on the new little one!
Sorry that you had to go through that, Elizabeth. Glad though, that you are pregnant again! What exciting news! I'm thinking PINK this time, but blue would be great too!!!!!
First of all, I'm so glad that you have shared this blog. What a beautiful + pregnancy test!! Second of all 172 according to myths...is indicative of a girl heartrate. I'm all about looking at myths right now with the twins. It's just added fun to speculate! And, finally..I LOVE the name Isaac and can totally identify with waiting and waiting and praying and praying for that positive test. Thanks for sharing Liz and girls, I get strength from your strength!
I'm so sorry to hear about your loss. I can't imagine. I am very excited about this pregnancy, though. We'll be keeping you all in our prayers.
Oh, Elizabeth! I truly can't imagine how painful the loss of a child must be. I'm so sorry. But I'm so glad to hear you are pregnant again. Congratulations!! I'll be praying for a healthy pregnancy!
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